


Invincible Without You, Vulnerable With You

by inknosed



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe, E for Sex, F/F, Hancock AU, Soulmates, SuperCorp, Trigger Warnings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-09-09
Packaged: 2020-01-06 23:05:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18398183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inknosed/pseuds/inknosed
Summary: Used to an isolated existence as the only one of her kind, Lena’s new life in National City is changed when she saves the life of Officer Alex Danvers and meets her adopted sister, Kara. With Kara’s help, Lena starts to change the people’s opinion about her. But there’s more between the two than chemistry. (Rated explicit for later chapters.)





	1. Sine Te Nihil Sum

**Author's Note:**

> First, shoutout to @avaswhore for giving me feedback on this one! Second, this is a Hancock AU, with Lena as Hancock and bringing disaster lesbian to a whole new meaning/level. I thought it would be interesting to have Lena be the one with powers and out saving people.

_1934..._

    _As she came to, everything rushed in to flood her mind and leave her barely above water. Smells invaded her nose, making her scrunch it up. It took a moment to think of their names: rubbing alcohol, dried blood, metal, other people with their perfumes and soaps._

_Her hands reached out and felt a worn blanket underneath. The bed she lay on was narrow and uncomfortable._

_Nearby, she could hear women speaking to each other. Beyond them, she could hear the hum of electricity in the building. Beyond that? Honking, yelling, laughing, hissing steam, footsteps, clinking glasses._

_Reaching a hand up, she found bandages covering the top of her head. Reluctantly, she opened her eyes and had to get past the overhead lights attempting to blind her. After her eyes adjusted, she could only see double for a long moment. It wasn’t just a ceiling, but the piping through the ceiling, and then the night sky beyond. With a few long blinks and slowing her breathing, she was able to focus and see only the plaster. Just a hallucination…_

_While there was a dull ache radiating from her skull, she didn’t understand how it had landed her in the hospital. In fact, there was a lot she didn’t remember._

_It was then that a woman came into view out of the corner of her eye. The sounds were still too loud, but she could pick out and focus on this one woman whose heart was beating far too rapidly._

_“Excuse me,” she called, her voice only a rasp. “Nurse?”_

_Dressed in a remarkably clean uniform, the woman walked to the side of her bed. For a moment, it appeared the woman was expecting something from her as she stared down at her patient. She swallowed before answering in a quiet and resigned voice, “How can I help you?”_

_“I - I’m afraid I don’t quite remember how I came to be here,” she said. A quiet groan left her as she moved to sit up. It was like she’d never used these muscles before. “Or… even my own name.”_

_With a touch to her wrist, the nurse stilled her from moving further. “Lena,” she murmured, letting her hand linger and bringing some warmth to her cold skin. “Your name is Lena.”_

_Lena? Does that sound right? It didn’t sound wrong. Her head rolled slightly to the side to look at the nurse. Brow furrowing, she closed her eyes when everything went blue and blurry with the outlines of things like the nurse’s skull and everything behind her hair._

_“Lena,” she tried out with a deep breath, feeling that hand on her wrist leave as warm fingertips trailed down to her hand and then disappear. “Thank you, nurse.”_

_Whether it was this head injury or another hallucination, Lena thought she heard the nurse say, “I’m sorry,” at the same time she heard, “You’re welcome.”_

 

* * *

 

**2019...**

    A crate of empty Jameson Irish whiskey bottles, a cement bus bench, a National City baseball cap, and a dirty Hawaiian shirt. This was how Michael found Lena on a normal Saturday morning. He shook her shoulder. When that didn’t rouse her awake, he lifted up her arm and dropped it on her chest. “Lena, bad guys.”

    85 years. 85 goddamn years since waking up alone in that hospital, and Lena found herself on a bus bench. What had happened last night? _Oh right, the liquor store robber_. Lena shook off the kid’s hand a little too hard.

    The TV store with a window full of screens was alight with the latest man-made catastrophe. ‘Three shooters who robbed a 7-Eleven are leading a chase on the 10 Freeway. We’ve got a chopper following now, stay with us as we track live.’

    “You should be out there helping,” Michael reminded her. Gotham got Batman. Metropolis got Superman. And National City? Well, this was their first superhero and she really did not fit the image in his head. Where was the uniform?

    In the time since Lena woke, life had been a lonely, singular existence. While she lived on without a mark on her, people continued to die around her. Humans weren’t worth forging relationships with. Though they were great for a borrowed bed and a hot shower.

    If she would’ve made the effort to fly home last night, she could still be asleep. It was getting far too close to noon judging by the sunlight creeping in on her bench, still blocked by the building beside her.

    While there was no chance of a hangover, that didn’t mean Lena was ready to be rudely awakened to an annoying 10-year-old and sunlight. Lena’s eyes rolled away from the televisions to the kid. “Shouldn’t you be in school?” she asked in a gravelly voice.

    He couldn’t tell if she was serious or not. “...it’s Saturday.”

    Reaching into the cardboard box, her hand found purchase on a full bottle as the gold band on her right hand _tinked_ against glass. A memento of another life she couldn’t remember. _Absence parts hands not hearts_ , it read. The words meant nothing to Lena, only an unsolved riddle she often reminded herself to forget.

    Bottle in hand, Lena sighed in relief as she sat up. “I knew that,” she muttered, opening the bottle and taking a long drink that drained half of the bottle. There was that familiar light burn to her throat. It was weird, probably in her head, but ever since she landed in National City, she seemed to feel the alcohol more. _Yeah, definitely in my head_.

    As she sat up, her back cracked away the vague soreness like an afterthought from sleeping on the hard bench. A thick pair of sunglasses fell down from her long, greasy, jet black hair. Lena yawned and fixed them on her nose. Did they really need her help on this one? Couldn’t she get breakfast first?     

    “Aren’t you gonna help?” Michael asked again, wondering what would motivate the second-rate superhero to move her butt. He mimicked a flying pose for her. “Up, up, and away.”

    Aside from watching people die, Lena also went out of her way to save people’s lives when she could. Chasing down robbers, putting out fires, helping a plane land, all things she’d done in the past a number of times. Without fanfare, without a cape, without a weird relationship with a sidekick. She couldn’t even tell you why she did it.

    But here was someone asking, so. With a roll of her neck, Lena put the cap back on the bottle. “I’m going, I’m going…”

    In a burst of movement, she leapt into the air and took off to follow the sound of sirens in the distance. Michael was left in a downpour of pebbles left from the messy take off. So much for the bus bench.

 

    A calvary of cop cars chased the black SUV along the 10 Freeway. From the looks of things, they’d already tried blowing the tires out. Way too far off was a line of stopped cop cars. Where Lena was flying? It didn’t look like the driver had any plans to slow down.

 _Showtime_. Narrowly dodging a sign for the next juncture, which in her opinion came out of _nowhere_ , Lena flew through the open sunlight in the car’s roof to land in the very back seat.

    There was a moment when no one spoke, besides the radio playing something with too much bass. Lena flipped her hair back out of her face. “Look, I’ll level with you: I just woke up,” she greeted them. “And I’d much rather you stop the car so we can avoid a shit show.”

    Three different voices starting shouting at her as the men brandished their guns in her direction. “Put your hands up!” “Put your hands behind your head!” “I’ll fucking shoot you!”

 _Men, always trying to compensate for what they don’t have_. “If you don’t shut up,” she warned. They started shooting before she could finish.

    Bullets rattled out of the guns and bounced off her body, ruining her shirt and her sunglasses. The jeans were slightly improved by the new look. It was only when some of those bullets ricocheted into them that the robbers stopped shooting.

    The only thing left of her bottle of whiskey was the neck still in hand. “Seriously?” Lena lifted her glasses, eyes burning bright red with held back power. “Now you’ve just pissed me off.”

    “You fucking bitch,” the driver screamed over his shoulder where a line of blood was beginning to bleed through the fabric.

    The guy in the backseat facing her shouted at the same time, “Crazy bitch!”

 _I’ve never liked that word._ The red of her eyes cooled back to steely green. “Call me a bitch.. _one_ more time,” she dared them.

    As soon as the b was out of a mouth, Lena slammed her boots through the bottom of the car, cement coming up around her feet as she slowed the car. _No more going easy._

    The cop cars that had been right on their tail began crashing into the bumper. With a jump, she was out of the car and lifting it up into the air to fly off the freeway and leaving the cops behind.

    “Who’s the bitch now?” she called down to them over the sound of their screaming. The skyscrapers of the National City seemed to jump out of nowhere, causing Lena to swerve and knock out the windows of some garish glass building.

    Just as she turned a corner, a helicopter sprang into view and surprised her enough to drop the SUV in tow. “That’s your fault,” she yelled back as she shot down to catch the vehicle. Still three heartbeats. Nobody dead yet, but one had passed out at some point.

 _So recklessly human_. Rather than deal with the NCPD, Lena dropped the SUV at the top of the CatCo building. Unfortunately, that’s where the NCPD helicopter came to land soon after. As her boots hit the landing, she dropped the bumper of the upside down SUV.

    It was a (dyed) redhead who came jumping out of the chopper with her gun held up. “What the _hell_ was that?” Her finger stayed along the barrel of the glock rather than over the trigger.

    “This is when you thank me. I take cash, checks if you’ve got nothing else,” Lena mused casually, “though those seem to be out of style with these apps now.” She didn’t have a cell phone to worry about. Nobody to call.

    The click of a gun came from near her feet but Lena was faster. She jumped in front of the officer as the man from the passenger seat shot off from a pistol. Turning on her heel as bullets ricocheted off her, Lena blew out a stream of ice breath that froze the entire side of the car.

    Trouble was it also knocked the SUV back to teeter on side of the building.

    Alex holstered her sidearm and started jogging forward. “There’s civilians down there. Get them!”

    “Jesus, okay,” Lena sighed.

    In just a few minutes, the SUV was off the side of the building, and the men were in custody and handcuffs. By all accounts, Lena should already be gone. Except for the damn redhead.

    “Put car on helipad because it was closest,” she repeated after Lena as she wrote it down. Alex flipped to a fresh page in her notebook. “We’re going to need you to come down to the station to make a statement.”

    “Ehm, no,” Lena took a measured step towards the edge of the building. She was cute but nobody was worth walking into a police station for. “I don’t really do that. You can handle the paperwork, I’m sure.” Her legs began to bend to jump out of there when Alex looked up.

    “Wait, before you go,” Alex said, stepping forward and closing her notebook. A smile replaced the blank I’m-a-professional expression on her face as she held out a hand. “I have to thank you. You took a bullet for me.”

    Eyeing the hand without taking it, Lena spoke over her, “They just bounce off.” She was ready to be alone again. Damn, she still needed to pick up another case of whiskey. Actually, no, she needed a bar with good food going off the growl of her stomach. _Then maybe there’ll be a fire I can put out, something exciting._

    “Nevertheless, I’d like to repay you for that,” Alex persisted, eventually dropping her hand. “Look, if you like spaghetti, my sister and I have this extravaganza on Monday nights. You eat food right? Normal food?”

    “Actually my powers come from being vegan,” Lena deadpanned. _Tough crowd, not even a smile_. She tacked on, “Yes, I eat normal food.”

    “Perfect, well,” Alex trailed off as she scribbled her address onto a fresh piece of paper at the back of her notebook. Kara was about to be in for the shock of her life. The new superhero of National City coming to Monday Night Spaghetti Extravaganza? If this didn’t get her promoted from Cat’s assistant to reporter, literally nothing would. “See you there at 6. No need to bring anything.”

    The paper hung in the air between them for a moment as Lena looked between it and the officer. _Whatever, if something goes wrong, I’ll just fly out_. That tactic hadn’t failed her yet.

Grabbing the paper, Lena stepped back and jumped off the building to take off into the air.

 

    At 6:34, Lena arrived at the apartment and knocked on the door. There was no reason for her to be here. _I should be at a bar or halfway home with a groupie by now._ Instead, she was standing in clothes she grabbed off a rack in some uptown store.

    Except this was the first time someone wanted to invite her back for a thank you dinner.

    After another millisecond of staring at the metal door with a glare of apprehension, Lena thought, _I’m not staying._ Just as she was turning to leave, the door opened and her stomach double back-flipped into oblivion. _Who in the holy hell..._

    “You’re late.” A blonde stood holding the door open. Her eyes widened as they met Lena’s. Lips hanging open, the woman’s breath caught in her throat to replace whatever she’d been about to say. Even in her boots, the blonde had an inch on Lena. There was a gold band on her right pointer finger that was almost pointing at her from where it hung next to the woman’s hip.

    She was devastatingly beautiful.

    Only once since waking up in that Brooklyn hospital in 1934 had Lena had felt something similar to this sapphic slap across the face. It had been about five years back in Gotham when that idiot Batman shot off a missile at her in mid air. The left side of her head began to ache just from the memory.

    She would’ve stayed staring at the woman forever if a voice hadn’t broke in.

    “There you are,” Alex said as she reached the door. “We were about to start without you.” She came to a stop and wiped her hands off on a towel. One look summed up the situation for her: Kara looked a mix between sad, shocked, but most of all confused. And Lena - well, Alex didn’t know her well enough to read her. “So.. Kara, this is Lena,” she hedged. “Lena, this is my sister, Kara, who normally knows how to talk.”

    Clearing her throat, Kara smiled abruptly without it reaching her eyes. “Sorry, come on in.” She turned and walked back into the apartment. “Though you _are_ late,” she added with some bite to her tone. For a moment, she looked over her shoulder back at Lena.

    Alex sent a glare after Kara but smiled to Lena and gestured her in. Lena gravitated after the blonde, before finally pulling her focus away to look around the apartment. It was the exact opposite of Lena’s trailer on the beachside cliff. For one, everything had been paid for, presumably. And secondly, it felt like a home, rather than a den.

    Half the place was just glass windows looking out onto the city. Framed pictures and pieces of artwork were precisely lined up along the brick walls. Fresh flowers sat in a kitschy vase on the coffee table covered in The New Yorker, CatCo Magazine, National Geographic, and the day’s newspapers.

    Matching bookshelves were piled with books, but a closer look beyond pointed out a safe hidden behind them. From her quick look inside, Lena figured it was a collection of family pictures and first editions of books. _A safe for mementos and books. Paranoid or sentimental?_

    “Nice place,” Lena said, running a hand over the front of her black button down. She paused by the couch, resting a hand on the woven red blanket across the back. “Are you two roommates too?”

    “Thank you,” Kara said, hurrying back to the kitchen to turn off the heat under the sauce. She kept her back to Lena. “And no, this is my home.” A sauce pan clattered into the sink. “We switch off every week.”

    Alex noticed the way Kara was acting but did her best to distract away from it as she turned to Lena. “Can I get you a drink?”

    _What’s her problem?_ Lena tried to think if she’d slept with her, but there was no way. She wouldn’t forget a woman like that.

    “I’d take whiskey if you’ve got it,” Lena said, deciding she could stay for dinner. She was hungry, the food was ready, and didn’t require intimidating or pilfering. Besides, Kara’s reaction to her was like a hangnail - impossible to ignore. “Or whatever’s strongest.”

 

    By the time they were moving to sit at the table, Lena hadn’t been able to shake off the weird feeling in her chest. The whiskey had helped get rid of the migraine. Yet, the sister hadn’t warmed up a single degree since Lena walked through the door. She gave up trying to figure out why Kara had her panties in a twist.

    While the spaghetti was pretty good, this dinner was as awkward as Lena expected. Even as they started to eat, it was clear that nobody knew what to say or talk about. Alex and Lena sat across from each other while Kara sat with a glass of wine at the head of the table.

    “Have you been in National City long?” Alex asked.

    Lena licked sauce off her lips before answering, “Something like a month.” Or was it two weeks? “I don’t really keep track. Immortality means no word-a-day calendars.”

    Two blinks from Alex. “So you’re.. immortal?”

    “As far as I know,” Lena shrugged.

    “That’s nice,” Alex nodded, not knowing what else to say. “Kara, isn’t that nice?”

    Kara took a sip of wine, speaking only to Alex. “I would think immortality would be a burden.” Cold blue eyes turned in Lena’s direction for the first time since they sat down. “I’d rather be human.”

    “Hmph.” Lena went back to eating and silence fell once more across the table.

    Forks scratched and slid against plates. Throats cleared. Second glasses of wine were poured to both sisters while Lena kept her bottle of whiskey on hand for refills.

    It was the third time Alex worked to start a conversation as she tried, “Kara works at CatCo. She’s trying to be a reporter.”

    Oh the daggers being glared. “She can speak for herself too,” Kara cut in, snapping her foot out under the table to kick Alex’s shin.

    “That’s.. lovely,” Lena nodded, taking a generous drink from her lowball glass. “I’ve never read it though.”

    “Really? That’s surprising. I thought everybody in the city did,” Alex said in a strained voice, subtly easing the pain in her shin with a free hand.

    Kara set down her fork for a moment. “What’s not ‘lovely’,” she began, “is when someone out of sheer carelessness breaks windows on the 36th floor and almost kills three workers. Care to comment?”

    There was a lot of vitriol in that tiny package, but Lena was used to this. So far, people didn’t seem to appreciate the good she did. Hell, they hadn’t since she started helping people back in 1938. All they saw were her mistakes, the accidents.

    “I’m sure Cat Grant can afford stronger glass next time,” Lena answered, taking another drink. She held Kara’s gaze as she raised a brow at her. Those pursed lips were pretty cute, even if she could hear Kara’s teeth grinding.

    “Not every situation calls for a battering ram,” Kara said, adjusting her glasses. “You could try a gentler touch.”

    Lena exhaled a laugh, the corner of her lips curling up. “I know plenty about having a gentle touch… _Kara._ ”

    The way steam seemed to blow out of Kara’s ears was so worth it. _Is she always this easy to tease?_

    Unamused and holding the edges of the table a little too tight, as if she were going to break it in half, Kara asked, “Do you take anything seriously?”

    Every time Alex tried to shoot a look across the table to Kara, her sister conspicuously avoided the gaze.

    _And with that, I’ve reached my limit_. “May I use your bathroom?” Lena cut in, setting down her napkin as she smiled to Alex.

    “Sure, it’s just down the hall,” Alex nodded. A sigh left her as she sat back and picked up her wine.

    Getting up from the table, Lena took the bottle of Jack with her. It was time to bail, something she should’ve done already.

    Almost as soon as she turned the corner into the hallway, she heard Kara ask Alex, “Did she just take the whole whiskey bottle to the bathroom?”

    Alex stared at her sister blankly. “Do you want her to kill us all?” she whispered back.

 

    Lena never went back to the dinner table. Eventually, the Danvers sisters stopped expecting her to, though Alex was the one to go check on Lena and found the bathroom empty.

    “I don’t understand it. This was your chance to have a real story, and you chased her out with a pitchfork.” Alex carried the last dish from the table into the kitchen. She paused and rested a hand on her waist as she studied Kara. “You _really_ hate her.”

    “I don’t—I don’t _hate_ her,” Kara protested, running a brush over the dishes from their spaghetti extravaganza. While her hands moved, her eyes were focused on her gold ring on the counter. She’d nearly lost it to the sink too many times to still wear it while doing dishes. The echo of a memory beat on in her ears. “I don’t even know her.”

    “Then why were you so awful to her,” Alex shot back, “when she saved my life this morning?” The last time Kara had reacted like this when meeting a new person - Alex couldn’t even think of an example.

    There was a long pause as Kara scrubbed at a stubborn spot, focusing once more. “I’ve seen what she’s done since arriving in National City. She breaks things, not fixes,” she tried to explain, a crease highlighting the scar beside her eyebrow. “Just the amount of money she’s costing the city is insane, and it’s like she doesn’t care about any of that.”

    Not too far away, Lena sat on the roof of the apartment building across from the Danvers sisters. She twisted the ring on her hand around with her thumb, focusing on the feeling of the inscription as it dragged against her skin.

    Lena had done more good since moving to National City than Kara ever had in her life, or _could_ ever. _She doesn’t know anything._ And _she’s not a real reporter._

    Yet... hearing it from the woman stung. Eyes flickering, she pursed her lips before jumping down to fly off into the night. The cool air cleared her mind as the stars lit her way back to the cliff on the coast.

    A sigh left Kara as she set the dish down and pushed a stray hair out of her eyes. “I’m grateful she saved you today, of course I am. But—”

    “But you are going to have to go apologize to her and try to fix what you messed up tonight,” Alex cut her off, throwing a dish towel at her sister’s face. “I’m serious, Kara. Take a bottle of something and apologize. Then chase her story down.”

    Kara groaned as she rested her head back, taking the towel to throw back at Alex half-heartedly. “...I’ll think about it.”


	2. Anam Cara

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With a reflexive jolt, Lena reached out a hand that gently rested over Kara’s on the table. The soft touch juxtaposed the power rippling through Lena’s arm. She could hear Kara’s breath catch in her throat.
> 
> “Wait.”
> 
> Both of their hearts were beating faster just from the light touch. Kara’s skin was warm, perhaps still holding the sun’s rays from outside.
> 
> OR
> 
> Kara seeks out Lena for an apology, and an offer from Cat Grant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again gotta start off by thanking @avaswhore for help with this chapter! Enjoy as the mystery gets that much more complicated. (If you don't want spoilers, avoid watching Hancock!)

     This had never happened to Lena before. For all the people she met in her life, not one had left her shaken. Not that farmboy Clark, or the billionaire Batman. Diana Prince, well she was a different case, but even meeting her paled in comparison to last night.

     It was infuriating.

     Who was Kara Danvers? In the scheme of things, she was just another woman, another human.

     And yet.

     As soon as she got home from the extravaganza, Lena opened up a new crate of whiskey and drunk until sleep finally, mercifully came. When she didn’t drink, there were too many nightmares waiting in her mind for the opportunity to attack. _And even in our sleep, pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart…_ Better to put herself to sleep the easiest way she’d found.

 

     This far away from suburbs, the city, and civilization, Lena could only hear the crashing of the waves nearby. When she flew her stolen Airstream trailer across the country, she’d gone until she hit the ocean and then found the most secluded spot possible.

     Light snuck through the cracks in her drawn curtains, warming the trailer and illuminating the detritus in the air. It touched upon the crowded closet full of pieces Lena had snagged over the years. Jiffy pop, Ovaltine, almond butter, and Wonder Bread on the counter. This trailer was less a home and more a collection of her life, a museum with few pictures and one patron.

     Here was where she could just be, without any expectations. For the chaos she knew every day, this was a place to land. What mattered was that she didn’t feel that constant urge to be somewhere else when she was here.

     Maybe National City would work out better than Gotham. Going into another super’s territory had been a bad idea.

     Standing up from the bed, Lena took the two small steps to reach a dresser. Inside was her collection of journals, full of worn pages and every blurry photo published of her throughout the years. Considering her age, you’d think there would be more. But Lena was normally good about staying out of the press. Until everybody started carrying a damn camera in their pocket.

     Of the research she’d done into her past, all of it could fit on one page: _My name is Lena_. Even that she hadn’t been able to verify, but just took the faceless nurse at her word.

     No marriage certificate despite the ring on her left hand when she awoke. _Looks better on my right hand anyways._ No identification. No memory of where she lived, despite the days she spent walking through the city for a crumb of recognition.

     Pushing past those journals, she grabbed a small tin box.

     Inside was everything the nurses found on her when she reached the hospital: two tickets for Tod Browning’s _Dracula_ , a piece of bubble gum, and a $2 dollar bill.

     Lena stared into the box, chewing on the corner of her bottom lip. When she brushed her fingertips over the items inside, willing them to speak to her, she was left disappointed. Again.

     So she closed the box, and opened a bottle.

* * *

     Two days after the disastrous and delicious Monday Night Spaghetti Extravaganza, Lena sat in an empty booth at the back of a bar. This had become a base for her in National City, a place to stop when she needed good food or a drink. The owner respected (was scared of) her, and owed Lena for putting out a grease fire in the kitchen.

     Nina Simone sang out from the jukebox across the smoky room. At this time of morning, it was only Lena and a few old timers with nothing to do but drink and stare into their glasses.

 _I’m the oldest one here_. By her estimation, she had to be around 120, at least. The only thing that showed her age was the posy ring on her hand.  

     When the door opened, nobody bothered to look Kara’s way. Lena only noticed her when she recognized her perfume. The pink get-up she was in from the buttoned blouse to the high-waisted pants looked like a Pepto Bismol bottle. This only made it more infuriating that Lena found it attractive.

     Noticing she’d been spotted, Kara hesitated for a heartbeat before continuing on her walk to the back. “Hi.” Anyone could tell from her body language she wanted to turn and walk right back out the door. “May I join you?”

     Lena poured herself another glass. “How’d you find me?” The alcohol was already starting to fade from her system, leaving the shadow of a buzz.

     Now that Kara was standing in front of her again, she felt that same pull she’d felt when they met. Perhaps it was the blue eyes hidden behind a pair of glasses, or the silky blonde hair pulled half up.

     Kara adjusted the bag on her shoulder. “I’m an investigative journalist.” A shift of her weight from foot to foot. “And it doesn’t take a genius to figure you’d be in a bar.” Not that Kara had spent the last two days going to the site of Lena’s past escapades in National City, or tracking the hashtag #ISawASuper on Twitter.

     It actually made Lena smile as she lifted the glass and exhaled a laugh that shook the ice. _That’s more like it_.

     Kara sighed, fixing her glasses. She let out a long breath and moved to slide into the booth across from Lena. “I’m sorry. Not the right foot to start on… I’m here to apologize — for last night. I wasn’t expecting company and it was a bad day at work, so.”

     Picking herself up, Lena sat with proper posture and raised an eyebrow. “So it has nothing to do with you being an assistant wanting to be a reporter?” Leveling her gaze across the table, she leaned forward with her hands clasped. “I think we can skip over your half-hearted apology for what you’re really here for, Kara.” _Did she just shiver when I said her name?_

     Those blue eyes cooled over as she looked back. After reaching into her bag, Kara took out a brand new reporter’s notebook. “I want to interview you,” she answered, clearing her throat. “Maybe if I can get your story out there, people will see you as more of a heroine, and less of an alcoholic alien.”

     With no concern for modesty, Lena let her eyes run over Kara from the top of her head to the hands holding her pen and paper. _A matching push-up bra, how thoughtful of her_. “I’ve never done interviews with reporters - or assistants. If you did your research, you’d know that.”

     In a huff of exasperation, Kara grabbed her bag and started to get out of the booth. “This was a stupid idea.” 

     With a reflexive jolt, Lena reached out a hand that gently rested over Kara’s on the table. The soft touch juxtaposed the power rippling through Lena’s arm. She could hear Kara’s breath catch in her throat.

     “Wait.”

     Both of their hearts were beating faster just from the light touch. Kara’s skin was warm, perhaps still holding the sun’s rays from outside. _There’s something here._

     “I could be persuaded into answering a few questions,” Lena allowed. “ _If_ you join me for a drink, and answer a few of my own.”

     Kara was slow to take back her hand, dropping into the booth in resignation. “It’s not even Noon.”

     “So just the tonic then?” Lena put on a winning crooked smile. _If I touch her again, will it feel the same?_  

     A sigh. Opening her notebook, Kara set her phone on the table between them and hit record. “You go by Lena, is that your real name or a misnomer?” She kept her expression blank as she held a pen poised over the paper. This interview was going to be impossible.

     Under the table, Lena stretched out the hand that had touched Kara’s. The warmth of her hand echoed over Lena’s skin. “It’s my only name.”

     Something flashed over Kara’s expression but she just made a note. “Let’s move on to public opinion,” she transitioned, swallowing thickly. “I’m gonna show you some footage and I want to get your impression of it.” Kara picked up her phone and with a few swipes brought up YouTube. “This was taken two weeks ago outside of a school.”

     The footage rolled and showed a group of children standing around an ice cream truck. In landed Lena, still smoking, with ripped clothes barely hanging onto her ash-covered body. “Move,” she growled, pushing kids out of the way. She climbed into the truck, baring half a butt cheek to the kids behind her. A number of jaws dropped while a few covered their eyes only to look through their fingers.

     Kara paused the video on Lena walking away with a Pink Panther popsicle in her mouth. “Do you see the problem?”

 _I was literally smoking_. “Have you ever doused an apartment fire, Kara?” Lena asked, looking up from the screen.

     Another nervous reach for her glasses to fix. “No, I can’t say that I have,” she answered primly. “But—”

     Lena gestured the obviousness of her answer: “I was hot. If anything, those kids learned about themselves that day.”

     A mixture of incredulity and exasperation showed on Kara’s face. “And what was that?”

     “My ass looks amazing no matter the situation,” Lena said as she sat back, a smirk on her lips.

     At this, Kara blinked owlishly for a moment. The pink of her cheeks grew more defined; though in anger or attraction, who could say?

     With an almost imperceptible shake of her head, Kara’s expression soured again. “Those were kids. You can’t just push them out of the way to steal a popsicle, Lena. Especially not half-naked and with so many cameras around these days.”

 _She almost sounds concerned_. “I didn’t hear a question in that.”

     Kara sat forward as she focused on Lena instead of her writing. She kept her hands held together and close to her side of the table. “Why are you here? Why National City? Why now?”

     How could Lena explain this? It was something that pulled on her gut, lead her from Brooklyn, to Metropolis, to Gotham, and everywhere in between until she found National City. This magnetism guiding her to chase after something that always felt just out of reach.

     So Lena gave the kind of answer expected from a superhero in a daytime television movie: “I go where I’m needed.”

     There wasn’t any coldness in Kara’s gaze as there’d been at dinner. When she looked at Lena now, her expression was unreadable. If anything, Kara looked like she was fighting a losing battle.

     For whatever reason, and she couldn’t find any reason behind it, Lena wanted to reach across the table and hold Kara’s face in her hands. It was as maddening as it was confusing. “I’ve got a question for you.”

     As if remembering her purpose in being here, Kara dropped her eyes to her notebook, opening it up to write down more notes. “What’s that?” 

     Of the hundred she could ask, Lena began with, “How long have you been in National City?”

     “Since I was 18. Came for college and stayed.” A few times, Kara got distracted by a small movement across the table. Each time, she gave the quickest glance she could manage. 

     Something was holding Kara at the table too, despite her simple answer. _She could’ve left by now_. “Why did you really track me down if you’re not going to properly interview me?”

     At that, Kara’s eyes jumped up from the page to meet bright green. “I— you— Let’s just go to the next question,” she settled on. “When and why did you start fighting crime?”

     “1938. I saw that people needed help.” _I can give short answers too_.

     “Why don’t you wear a uniform?”

     “I don’t know any designers.”

     “When’s your birthday?”

     “No clue.”

     “Where are you from?”

     “Brooklyn.”

     “Are you,” a sigh from Kara at the question, “Are you an alien?”

     “Not that I know of,” Lena answered diplomatically, “but if a spaceship comes for me, we’ll both have an answer.”

     Lena watched as Kara seemed to swallow back another statement. “When you threw Harvey the whale back into the ocean when you first arrived, did you not see the ship you were throwing him towards or did you not care?” 

     This made Lena pause as she thought back. When she arrived in National City, that had been right after the spat with Batman over territory. “I honestly don’t remember throwing a whale,” she mused, unfazed.

     “Of course not.” 

     Both hands moved up to rub fingertips into her forehead as Kara sighed. After a breath, she looked back to Lena. “Look, I told my boss about this opportunity. That’s the only reason I’m here and not getting her a coffee from Noonan’s or answering her fan-mail. Cat Grant is interested in helping to reshape your image. She thinks that if you fix up your act, you could be a real hero.”

     “Fix up my act?” Lena quoted, letting out a delighted chuckle.

     Undeterred, Kara continued, “She says it’s payback for nearly taking out a whole floor of her building.”

     Sitting forward, Lena considered Kara with a tilt of her head. For most people, she could read them with a glance. Not this one. “So she assigned _you_ to help me, did she?”

     “It would appear so.” Kara closed her notebook and put it back in her bag. “Trust me, it’s the last thing I want to be doing either—”

     While Kara spoke, Lena considered the possibility. If she worked with Kara, maybe she could get more answers from her. It could quiet the curiosity to know more about the blonde. What she risked was this burning curiosity only getting brighter the more time she spent with the woman.

     “Does it come with a paycheck?”

     Those blue eyes went wide again. “What?”

     “I’m assuming I’ll be paid for my time,” Lena said.

     Kara’s brow furrowed. “I— you’re not seriously considering this.”

     With a shrug of her shoulders, Lena finished off her drink. “Cat Grant doing a PR makeover for me doesn’t sound like the worst idea.”

     If Lena did this, she knew the people she helped would like her more. Humans responded to uniforms, and the gravitas of vigilante superheroes. National City could become a permanent place to stay. This odd city where the feeling in her gut quieted as if she’d found a home. This place where she didn’t feel so restless. Where alcohol burned sweeter, the air was clearer, and she’d gotten her first thank you from someone she saved.

     For a moment, Kara’s mouth hung open with the breath poised to turn into words. But she just exhaled. “You shouldn’t,” she managed a second later.

     This time, Lena raised both brows. “You’re going to give me whiplash.” First, Kara is as cold as an ice sculpture at dinner. Then she tracks her down in a bar to offer an opportunity to be a hero like Superman. “And why exactly shouldn’t I?”

     “Because—” The huff of frustration paired with Kara’s lips pursing together.

     An amused smile began to bloom at the corner of Lena’s lips. “You didn’t think I’d say yes.”

     “Of course not!” Kara’s eyes went wide as she shook her head. “Everything you’ve done points to you being a loner with a goddess complex.”

     “I’ve met a goddess and she was very pleasant,” Lena commented, tapping Kara’s notebook. _If Diana could see me now…_

     “You can’t be National City’s hero— you just can’t.” Kara started putting away her phone and her notebook.

     “Is that a challenge, Miss Danvers?” Lena truly could not understand how this woman’s mind worked. “Tell your boss that I will see her tomorrow.”

     Both women stood at the same time, stepping out of the booth so that the table didn’t stand between them anymore. The air crackled between them. Lena felt that warmth in the air once more.

     Kara stared down at Lena, using all of the single inch she held over the other woman’s height. What was she going to do? Forbid Lena from coming in? None of this was happening the way it was supposed to. It wasn’t supposed to happen at all. She was losing her grip.

     “You’re impossible,” Kara growled, turning on her heel to leave the bar.

     Now that she saw the outfit from the back, Lena could properly appreciate how the light pink pants hugged Kara’s curves. It was a saving grace for the weirdest conversation she’d ever had in her life.

* * *

     The next day, Kara was nowhere in sight as Lena arrived at CatCo. You’d expect an assistant to be at her desk outside the boss’s office. Instead it was Cat who greeted her as soon as she walked onto the floor. So much for the dress she’d worn specifically to see Kara’s reaction to it.

     “Where’s Kara?” Lena asked as soon as the door closed behind them. “I was under the impression she would be the one leading this crusade of sorts.”

     Sighing at the mere mention of her assistant, Cat just waved a hand to brush away the question. “The flu or something. The first day she’s ever been sick and it’s the day she tosses her chance of being a reporter out the window.”

 _Odd_. “I see,” Lena said, stepping into the office and taking a seat on one of the white couches. _Did she fake being sick just to avoid seeing me again?_ Possible, but that line of thinking was hardly probable. “Well, then I suppose we can start without her. She said something about ‘cleaning up’ my ‘act’?”

     As Cat took a seat behind her desk covered in papers and binders of material to be signed off on, she smiled at her latest catch. This would win her another Pulitzer. “Why don’t you start by telling me about where you came from?”

     Settling into her seat, Lena tried to put Kara out of her mind as she told Cat just how boring her origin story was. “It began in Brooklyn.”

 

     Luckily, Cat was much more open to day drinking than Kara, which made the interview Lena sat through easy to swallow. The details she gave were mostly meaningless and had more to do with her time in the last decade than anything beyond.

     By the time Lena was bored and ready to leave, Cat had lined out an entire plan for Lena’s re-introduction to society. When Cat looked at Lena, she saw possibility. Here was a woman who was invincible and ready to take on National City.

     “This is going to take you off of bus benches and put you on the map,” Cat promised, looking proudly at the front page article she’d whipped up: _**MYSTERY HEROINE LENA TELLS ALL**_. “Finally something to go up against that Lois Lane’s Superman articles,” she added with noted smugness, “which are truly just a girl’s projected fantasies on a muscle man in spandex.”

     Lena drummed her fingers against the arm of the couch, staring off into the city. She let her eyes move back and forth between X-Ray vision and regular. Unconsciously, she twisted the ring on her right hand. _Absence parts hands not hearts_...

     “Lena?”

 _What if this is the wrong move?_ From the way Cat fawned over her, Lena was starting to think this would end up with her as an action figure or on the front of a Wheaties box. And she didn’t even know if Wheaties were still a popular brand of cereal.

     But there was money. The cash was already waiting for her in a discreet black purse at her feet. Sure, the money would allow her to buy things, like food and drinks and clothes. Lena was just used to taking those things anyways.

     Why was she doing this again? Her jaw set and lips pursed, she stared out at the city full of people. They were all just living their simple lives, working 9 to 5 jobs, talking around a water cooler, making phone calls. It was all so alien, and so human.

     It was all out of reach.

     Clearing her throat, Cat called louder, “Lena.”

     “Hm?” Lena turned her head.

     “We’ll have you do the press conference as soon as possible. I’ve already got a uniform ready for you. Think of this as an endorsement deal,” Cat explained, standing up from her desk to walk around to the younger looking woman. “In the end, everybody wins.”

     “Yes, of course.” Lena stood and picked up the bag to carry. “Tomorrow then?”

     “Whenever you arrive, we can get things set up in under an hour,” Cat promised, beginning to walk to the door out of her office.

     Lena went for the window instead. As she jumped into flight, she listened to the city until she found something capable of distracting her.

 

     Never let it be said Cat Grant wasn’t a woman of her word.

     As soon as Lena arrived by balcony the next day, Cat was ready to pounce. “Kiera!”

     Once Lena’s shoes touched down on the cement, wearing a baggy sweater and torn jeans, Kara came walking into the office, looking a little green. A glance was exchanged and Lena saw the way Kara’s throat moved as she swallowed.

     “Yes, Miss Grant?” Kara kept her eyes focused on Cat.

     “Put out the message. Get everyone started on downstairs and bring in the other stations,” Cat said, typing out a tweet on her own phone to get the buzz stirring. “And where are the hair and makeup teams?”

     “I’m on it, Miss Grant.” With another small look in Lena’s direction, Kara turned to walk back out, two phones in hand.

 _You’re not getting away that easy_. It was a fluid movement that placed Lena next to Kara’s side. “The flu, huh? Was it a 24 hour bug?”

     “Something like that,” Kara said, eyes trained on her phones as both thumbs texted different people. “If you’ll excuse me, I have a job not to fudge up.”

     Lena studied her as Kara walked off, tilting her head to see her that millisecond longer.

 

     The next hour was spent prepping Lena. Her long black hair was straightened out down to soft curls, tucked behind her right ear to show off a pair of earrings borrowed from Cat. The makeup softened her features but paired with a dark maroon lipstick. A garment bag was brought out with a dark green peplum dress inside that once slipped on fit like a second skin.

     Lena was still staring at her reflection in the mirror when Cat handed a flash card to her. It had been a long time since Lena had looked anything like this. Instead of looking cartoony or overdone, she looked powerful.

     She cleared her throat and checked out the card. “This is it? I just read it?”

     “And try to smile, it’ll make you seem more approachable,” Cat said, with a knowing roll of her eyes.

     Brow furrowed, Lena skimmed the card and barely held in a laugh at it. _Who’s going to believe this? If this is all it takes, I should’ve done this years ago._

     It was then she felt a spark on the edge of her awareness. Lena raised her eyes to find Kara staring. Those blue eyes wandered from the slender image of Lena’s neck down over her breasts and didn’t stop until she was licking her lips at the image of red-bottomed heels.

     Now that, that alone might make the day worth it.

     Cat broke both of their spells. “What is it, Kiera?”

     “Everything’s ready downstairs,” Kara answered a little too quickly and loudly, fixing her glasses as she looked back to Cat. “They’re just waiting for you, Miss Grant.”

     With a clap of her hands, Cat got the whole room of people moving.

     Lena stood from her seat, holding the cue card in hand. Was all of this moving fast? Yes, and she was dazed from it. But ever since the idea entered her head, and ever since Kara told her not to, Lena felt it was the only thing _to_ do.

     “Oh, just one last thing,” Lena added, stopping Cat with a touch on her forearm.

     With the look of an exasperated ring leader, Cat still smiled as she said, “And what’s that, another bottle of brandy?”

     “No.” Lena dropped her hand before she bruised something. “Kara should stand with her sister, Officer Danvers. Don’t you think?”

     It was a battle of the brows as the women stared each other down. In one corner, business magnate Cat Grant, who was just about to shake the world. In the other, a superhuman with laser eyes and freeze breath.

     Neither appeared to hear Kara’s protests to being on camera. “Actually, I’d prefer it if—”

     “Makeup, hair, do what you can for Kiera on the elevator ride down,” Cat finally caved. “There’s no time for more.”

     And with that, they were off.

 

     There was a crowd of reporters holding out microphones standing beside their camera people. It was a lot like standing in front of a firing squad. Lena had never done something like this before, not just apologizing but talking to the press. No wonder Clark only gave interviews to his girlfriend.

     Ever since she woke up to these powers, Lena had done what she could with what she had. No one had been there to claim her, so she struck out on her own with only a few things in her pocket, the blood stained clothes on her back, and a ring on her hand.

     Now she stood outside of CatCo with Cat Grant, Alex, and Kara behind her. The green dress highlighting every curve, black Louboutin’s on her feet had her standing up straighter with her shoulders rolled back. This was the posture of a woman raised to be a lady with poise. A woman out of time.

     Lena spoke to those gathered as if she were giving a proper speech, instead of the few lines on her flash card. “I would like to apologize to my fellow National City citizens,” she began. “My past behavior is well known, but I am here to turn over a new leaf.”

     “That’s a big leaf,” someone muttered. Chuckles rippled through the crowd.

     This wasn’t what Lena expected, but she should’ve known. Clenching her jaw, she looked back to Cat who only nodded in silent encouragement. Resigned, she continued, “Life here can be difficult for me. After all, I’m the only one of my kind.”

     Reporters flung out questions: “What are you?” “Are you an alien like Superman?” “What ‘kind’ is that?”

     Breathing out through her nose, Lena finished with: “You deserve better from me. I can be better. I will be better.” Ignoring the new laughter from the crowd, as well as the jeers and questions, Lena turned to walk away into the building.

     Before anyone else could catch up to her, Lena was already at the back door to leave. _What a stupid idea. As if they’d take me seriously._ In the moment, she couldn’t remember any of the reasons she’d done this in the first place.

     And then a voice called out.

* * *

     “Lena, wait!”

     Kara jogged across the first floor, heart in her throat. _How dare they, how_ dare _they laugh at her._ The sound was still in Kara’s ears and making her blood boil.

     Hand on the door, Lena stayed facing away for a long moment. All Kara saw was the shift of her shoulders as she breathed in and out. When she turned back to Kara, her expression was as clear as a metal sheet plate. “What?”

     Taken aback by the tone, Kara slowed her approach but didn’t stop. She didn’t have words for how this felt.

     How do you face the one you love when they look back at you without an ounce of recognition? Centuries erased, lifetimes even.

     It ripped at her heart, but Kara had learned how to hold it in a long time ago. For all the languages she knew, for all the ways she could say it, saying _I love you_ to Lena now would only confuse her. It would only hurt her and sound like a joke. Nor could Kara explain why all of this was such a horrible idea.

_You don’t understand. You don’t remember how this will end, how it always ends._

     So what was she left with? What were her options?

     “I—”

     Both of their heads whipped to the side at the sound of gunshots and screams interrupting the tense moment.

     “I’m sorry,” Lena said, looking genuinely remorseful as she pushed open the back door. “I’ve got to go.”

     “Of course,” Kara nodded, reaching her hand to twist at her ring. “Be careful.”

     A cocky smirk came to Lena’s face as she stepped outside. “That’s not really my style.” She leapt into the air, breaking the expensive shoes.

     Kara stepped outside and watched as Lena disappeared into Cat’s office before speeding back out in her new uniform. “Everything you ever wanted,” she murmured to herself.

     Hugging her arms around her stomach, Kara prayed to the gods it hadn’t already begun.

  



	3. נועדנו להיות יחד.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena gets her chance to show National City what she's capable of during a bank robbery. The Danvers sisters take her out to celebrate after the victory as Lena gets pulled further into Kara's orbit.

     There was a vast difference between a half-drunk Lena showing up to a crime scene in a Hawaiian shirt and jeans, versus the sober, pissed off, and uniformed Lena that landed outside of National City First Bank.

     If given more time, Lena was sure Cat would’ve had Lena stay behind to adjust her makeup to match the fitted gray supersuit she wore, lined in a dark red that almost matched the stain on her lips.

     A line of cop cars were stationed outside of the bank with nervous officers pointing their guns toward the entrance. From the people watching with rapt attention to the string of reporters, some of whom she recognized from moments ago, it was clear this was an incredible chance to turn around their perception of her.

 _Just act like a hero, like Diana or Clark_. _...not Batman._

     Rolling her shoulders back, Lena walked over to the woman in charge. It was clear from the way she held herself without any show of panic.

     “Hello.” Lena’s voice was a little deeper than intended, so she cleared her throat. _Act like you belong here._ “I’m here to help. What’s the situation?”

     The captain was nonplussed for a moment. A blink later and the woman had her decision made. “A group of armed robbers have taken hostages inside,” she said. “I’ve got an officer pinned down and wounded. Think you can get to her out of there?”

     A quick look through the outside of the building showed the situation inside. Lena focused her vision back outside and spotted the officer hiding on the ground behind her patrol car.

     “No problem. Just tell your officers to watch the ricochets off my back,” she added.

     A hand reached out to pause her. “They’ve got armor piercing grade ammo. I don’t know if that matters for someone like you.”

     Lena nodded. “That won’t affect me.”

     With that, she headed out into No Woman’s Land. There was a large empty space between the line of cars and the steps of the bank. In one leap, she bounded over the cop cars and landed next to the vehicle where an injured woman was clutching a gun in one hand and holding a belt around her bleeding leg with the other. Immediately, shooting came from the doors of the bank towards the car, busting out more glass to rain over them.     

     Ignoring it, Lena knelt down beside the police officer. “Good job,” she started with, loud enough to be heard over the guns going off around them. (Cat’s idea to bolster fragile egos.) “Do I have permission to put my hands on your body?”

     “Yes,” Maggie cried out, sweat dripping down her face from adrenaline.

     Before touching the woman, Lena paused. _What would Clark do now?_ “This is not in a sexual way,” she clarified. Cat had mentioned sexual harassment during their first meeting. “Not that you’re not attractive. You are an attractive wo—”

     “Get me the fuck out of here!” Desperate eyes stared up at Lena.  

     “Right.” With that covered, Lena flipped up the cop car next to them. In one arm, she carried the officer. With the other, she lifted the car as a shield between them and the bank.

     As Lena walked them towards the line of cop cars, she spotted Alex waiting at the edge in the dress uniform she’d worn for the press conference. _Was that really only a couple of minutes ago?_

     “Maggie!” Alex yelled out.

     Knowing Alex could take care of the woman, Lena dropped her off in Alex’s waiting arms. Relief was etched into Alex’s every move as she helped Maggie to the nearest ambulance.

     It was more screaming from inside the building that pulled Lena’s attention out of her feelings and back into action. Another burst of movement launched her into the air to build up speed.

     Surveying the building, Lena picked up on the line of hostages along the floor. _Strapped with C4_ , she noted. The robbers would have to be taken out first.

 _WHOOSH!_ The first swipe through the building took out the guards along the North side of the building. Lena dropped them from far enough up as she flew past the cops to incapacitate them and leave some broken bones. The second swipe took out the robbers from the South side of the bank. Again, she dropped them on a pile without their weapons. Not even 30 seconds had passed.

     With her next move, Lena landed inside the building to face the last robber.

     This man wore a sneer and the beads of sweat on his forehead matched his racing heartbeat. And yet he was confident as he spoke, “All I have to do is take my thumb off this device, and we all go up.”

     Late 40s white male with graying brown hair and no definition to his body. An unremarkable man, a forgettable one.  

     Her walk was slow as Lena moved towards one of the nearby tables. “What is it you want?” she asked, needing a few more moments to finish this thing properly.

     “$10 million in unmarked bills,” the man spoke. “And a chopper at the top of the building to take me to the nearest airport. Either I get all that in the next hour, or this place turns to dust.”

 _What can I use?_ Lena noted the tight grip the man had on the trigger in hand. It was a pressurized detonator. “I don’t think that’s going to happen for you.”

     “Who’s gonna stop me, you? I’m not fucking scared of you!”

     Lena reached up to remove the top of a nearby lamp. A sheet of round metal was perfect; with a single push, she had it flattened out. She began to run her thumb nail along the edge to sharpen it into something deadly.

     “Do I really have to explain this to you again, bitch? I’m holding the bomb’s trigger in my hand,” he growled out leaving spit behind on his chin.

 _I really hate that word_. “I know,” Lena said calmly, lifting up her flat circle of sharpened metal. “Hold on tight for me.”

     With a flick of her wrist, the circle went flying through the air. In the next moment, the hand was on the ground still clutching the detonator in a vice grip.

     The robber gasped, then stared at his wrist in shock as if he couldn’t yet feel it. When reality hit, his scream was higher pitched than anything Lena was prepared for.

     Moments later, Lena walked out of the bank with the hostages trailing after her. None of them were running up to thank her, but Lena could understand when she was holding a severed hand.

     “Don’t shoot!” both hostages and officers started to call out as the group left the bank behind. The bomb squad was first up the stairs to help de-rig the hostages.

     Walking down the steps, Lena spotted the captain who had helped her before with the information. “Good job,” she started with.

     Again, a confused expression greeted her before the captain laughed, “No, _you_ did a good job. We didn’t lose a single person thanks to you.” The woman held out her hand.

     Lena placed the hand holding the detonator into the waiting hand. “The bomb squad will need this.”

     When Lena turned to go, she recognized the sound she was hearing. It was clapping. She looked back over her shoulder to the people gathered, slowly working their way up to cheering her name. _This… hasn’t happened before_.

     Not knowing how to react, or what to do, Lena just waved a single hand towards the people before taking off into the air again. The sound of the people shouting out their thanks echoed in her ears as she smiled to herself.

* * *

     A week later, Kara shocked Lena with an invitation to dinner with both Danvers sisters. Apparently after seeing Alex spend so long in the hospital at Maggie’s side, Kara just wanted to get her sister a decent meal and a night away from stressing over her girlfriend.

     “Do you think you can join us?” Kara asked sounding hopeful.

 _Maybe a cell phone would be worth having, if only to have more time to think over things like this_. But as soon as Lena looked up from staring at her hands, those blue eyes drew her in and practically spoke the words for her: “I’ll be there.”

     Goddesses help her, was Lena really so helpless to say no now? After Kara ran after her at the press conference, Lena had been waiting for another moment to appear. _Perhaps tonight_.

     So Lena found something worth wearing to one of the nicest restaurants in National City and met the sisters there. The button-up shirt had a simple pattern of black and white shapes, but what mattered was how the shirt was mostly see through. Her black bra visible underneath. It was time to test Kara’s reaction to her, to see about turning the tables in her favor.

     As Lena arrived at Providence, the photographers outside the restaurant surprised her. They photographed her as if she were another one of the celebrities or actresses eating at Providence that night.

     With a muted smile, Lena walked past them and into the restaurant. No one stopped her as she walked past the hostess and followed the sound of Kara and Alex talking to each other.

     “-be back at the hospital.”

     “I swear, Alex, if you say that one more time, I’ll pout.” Kara raised a threatening eyebrow.

     Lena raised her own curious brow as she reached the table. “Do I need to interrupt this fight?” she teased, still feeling confident from the attention outside. That and the dress Kara had chosen to wear that night was exquisite. It was a dark red with a bow on the side and a high collar. She let her eyes wander luxuriously as the sisters continued their squabble. _I’m not the only one who dressed for the occasion._

     Alex rolled her eyes toward Kara. “I was just explaining to Kara that as happy as I am to celebrate what you did, Lena, I’d rather be back with Maggie.”

     “And _I_ was saying,” Kara shot back, still focused on her sister, “That it was Maggie who was shoving you out the door in the first place. She said you were starting to smell worse than her.”

     It was then that Kara turned to look at Lena. There was a surge of satisfaction as Lena watched Kara’s eyes widen behind her glasses.

     “I’m sure everything will be fine, Alex,” Lena said, unfolding her napkin to drape over her lap. It had been a considerable time since she wanted to impress a woman, so she preened a little and sat up straighter while Kara gained control over her motor functions again. “If you get a call, I’ll fly you back to the hospital myself.”

     While Alex was obviously distracted, she started to relax after her second beer. Kara just picked up her menu to try to hide behind, and look at Lena over.

     Lena grabbed her own menu and tried to focus more on her options for dinner and less on staring at every small movement or sound Kara made beside her.

 

     Later, once their plates were cleared, each woman was left with their drink as they relaxed in their seats. Lena would call this dinner a success if only for the way Kara’s chair had ended up closer to hers through the night. She spent more time trying to hide every look she sent Kara’s way than worrying about being a decent guest.

     Alex sat forward, interested as Lena seemed more open to answering questions now. “You’re from another planet, aren’t you?”

     “No,” Lena chuckled. It was amusing to see this relaxed side of Alex. Maybe now that she’d saved Maggie’s life, Lena would get an invitation to Monday Night Spaghetti Extravaganza. “I’m from New York.”

     Narrowing her eyes, Alex pursed her lips and stared Lena down until she was satisfied. “So,” she said before taking another drink of beer, “Is what Cat printed about you true? The whole woke up in a hospital - wait! It was a military research hospital wasn’t it??”

     Again, Lena shook her head and took another drink of whiskey. It was only her third glass of the night, rather than third bottle. “Regular old Brooklyn emergency room. There’s no secret origin story here, though I’m sorry to disappoint.” Talking about her beginnings had Lena clearing her throat and tearing her attention away from Kara.

     “That just - I mean it doesn’t make sense,” Alex said.

_Tell me about it._

     Kara took a long drink from her wine glass. When she set it back on the table, it took her a moment before she looked up from the table.

 _Why is she uncomfortable now?_ While Lena’s own stomach churned, she kept her voice level as she spoke, “I know. I had a, ehm, fractured skull. Nurses said I was trying to stop a mugging?” She shrugged at this detail she’d never been able to confirm. “Apparently, I was a normal woman. They wanted to know my story, just like you.”

     Alex persisted, a frown set on her face. “But, wasn’t there somebody there who came looking for you?”

     Now that Kara had looked at Lena, she didn’t look away.

     While Lena could see Kara stare from the corner of her eye, she kept her focus on Alex. It was easier to say all this to the older Danvers sister. “Only thing I had in my pocket was some bubblegum, a $2 bill, and two movie tickets.”

     Reaching across the table, Alex patted the back of Lena’s hand twice. _Pat pat._ “That is… so sad. I’m sorry.”

     This wasn’t something Lena could brush off. So she lifted her glass and finished it off, the buzz from the joy of the night fading into memory already. “It’s fine,” she said finally. The conversation had drawn Kara closer to Lena, but the blonde still looked uncomfortable. A practiced smile came back to Lena’s face for a moment, until it faltered again. “I just…” Her gaze turned thoughtful as she looked first to the white tablecloth and then back to Alex.

     This was what could keep her up at night if she let herself think about it. If she let herself wonder about the wedding ring on her hand.

     “What kind of bitch must I have been… that nobody was there to claim me?” _What did I do that drove them away?_ “I mean I’m not the most charming person in the world, but… nobody?” Lena breathed out and shook her head. “ _That_ , that I don’t get.”

     Beside them, a tear slipped down Kara’s cheek as she swallowed thickly. Alex more readily comforted her sister with a hand reaching out to squeeze the top of her arm. “Hey, you okay?”

     Kara swallowed and quickly dabbed at her eyes. “Yeah, just - too much wine.”

     Seeing that show of emotion from Kara, Lena was back to minimizing it all as she smiled without it reaching her eyes. _So much for flirting. Humans don’t want the tragic backstory._ “Like I said, it’s fine. It’s in the past. Whoever that ticket was for, they’re dead by now, so it doesn’t really matter.”

     Those blue eyes turned to look at Lena, still brimming with unshed tears. “I’m sorry, Lena,” Kara said just above a whisper.

     Blinking, Lena looked down for a moment. _Why are you apologizing?_ “Not your fault.”

     Luckily, Alex was there to jump in. She waved her hands at both women. “Okay, enough sad.” Raising her pint, she said, “How about cheers to Lena, the new heroine of National City?”

     Lena raised her empty lowball as Kara cleared her throat and lifted her wine glass.

     “To Lena,” Kara murmured, holding Lena’s gaze as the glasses clinked together.

     Her heart faltered as Lena looked back at Kara, held in her gaze like it was her only lifeline. A feeling like that? It could only scare her. When she looked at Kara, it felt less like magnetism drawing her in and more like being pulled into orbit, finding a home.

_Ridiculous._

     And yet, Lena found herself gravitating ever closer to the younger woman. It was less like the blatant flirting she’d done when she arrived, and more subtle. A touch to the back of Kara’s warm hand, refilling her glass of wine, standing to leave only after Kara stood.

     This was how Lena found herself offering to help Kara get Alex home, if only to get a chance to talk to her alone.

     “Are you sure? I don’t want to be an imposition,” Kara said as they waited for a cab.

     “You’re hardly imposing, Kara,” Lena reminded her, holding Alex up with an arm around her waist.

     “Yeah, _Kara_ ,” Alex laughed.

     When the cab arrived, Lena found herself grateful for Alex acting as a buffer between her and Kara. If Lena had sat next to Kara, she would’ve been helpless. Even with the space, she had to remind herself not to stare.

 _You shouldn’t have talked about your past_ , she thought as she stared out the window instead. _She’ll only pity you. Or worse, think you’re a freak._

     Lena twisted the ring on her hand, having to be careful not to bend the gold at all. For so long, she’d been surviving on her own that she’d forgotten what it felt like to want someone like this. Though now that she stopped to think about it, she’d never wanted someone like this.

     It wasn’t just sex on her mind as she sat only a few feet away from Kara in the backseat of the cab. No, she was picturing spaghetti extravaganzas and showing up at CatCo to take her to lunch. Silly domestic things that shouldn’t matter or even appeal to her.

     Things she couldn’t have. Right?

* * *

     Kara was holding on by a very thin, already worn thread.

     It wasn’t just the see through shirt Lena was wearing, or the curve of her hips. No, after hearing Lena’s side of things during dinner, Kara was only just managing to hold herself together.

     It was Lena’s words that now hung like a yoke around Kara’s neck, weighing her down and making it hard to breathe.

 _‘What kind of bitch must I have been… that nobody was there to claim me?’_ Just hearing those words again in her head had Kara tearing up on the cab ride home.

 _‘I mean I’m not the most charming person in the world, but… nobody?’_ Looking over Alex’s head, Kara had a brief moment to stare at Lena as she looked out the window at the people the drove past.

     What wretched anguish to sit so close to Lena, _her_ Lena, and yet feel a chasm between them. Looking down to her hands, Kara took the gold wedding band from her right pointer finger and read the inscription inside: _Anam cara._

     For a moment, Kara was lost to ancient memories of when Lena so lovingly slid that ring onto her hand. The pride in Lena’s eyes as she brushed her thumb over Kara’s hand.

_‘Now even when we’re apart, you’ll have me with you, my love.’_

     Kara breathed out a quiet sigh as she looked out the window, moving the band back onto her left hand where it belonged. Even if she was the only one who knew.

     Back at the apartment building, Lena carried a happily drunk Alex up to Kara’s apartment.

     “Leeena,” Alex stretched out the name. “We should hang out more. You- _you_ are one badass chick.”

     “Any time, Officer Danvers,” Lena chuckled, back in brighter spirits.

     Kara unlocked her front door and moved it aside so Lena could carry Alex in. She watched as Lena carefully angled her sister inside the apartment.

     “Where should I put her?”

     “You can put her in the bedroom. It’s the door on the left,” Kara said as she took off her coat to hang up.

     “One more beer!” Alex cheered. “For this queer!”

     Kara heard Lena laugh again as she turned the corner. Then a realization slammed down on her. _Oh no_. With Alex fast on her way to sleep, she would be alone with Lena. There wouldn’t be someone to stand in between them. At least when Kara went to the bar for the interview, the place had other people in it.

     In a panic, and without knowing what else to do, Kara went to her sink and found a stack of clean dishes to throw in and reclean. _Try to get her out the door as quickly as possible. No nightcap, no pleasantries. Very busy with dishes._

     The sound of Lena’s heartbeat drew closer after she closed the door to the bedroom. Kara kept her head down as began lathering up a sponge. _Just hold on until Lena’s gone. Don’t confuse her. She’ll only be hurt._

     “She’s asleep,” Lena said as her footsteps stopped only a few feet from Kara.

     “Okay, thanks, goodnight.” Kara knew her voice was too breathy, but she couldn’t exactly fix that right now when she was trying not to crush the porcelain dish into dust.

     With Lena taking a single step closer, Kara could feel the hairs on the back of her neck begin to stand on end. Goosebumps covered both of her arms. _This dish is just so interesting. So. Damn. Interesting._ “I’m sure you have to be on your way now. City to protect.”

     Another step. The sound of Lena’s heart barely beating faster. The smell of perfume so unlike what Lena used to wear.

 _A turn wouldn’t hurt... Just to look at her_.

     Kara felt the last brick of her resistance shatter like ice as she set down the dish and turned to look at Lena.

     Pale green eyes bore into her soul as Lena took that last step to be in front of Kara. While there was an entire city of noises outside, Kara could only hear herself swallow.

     “I guess you’ll be leaving,” she murmured, eyes darting between Lena’s. Those eyes that she had spent centuries staring into, losing herself as she did now and always would. Kara rested a hand on the counter just to hold herself up.

     With a slow, graceful movement, Lena placed her hand on the counter next to Kara’s. The millisecond she took just to touch Kara’s hand was torture.

     Eyes falling, Kara looked to their hands as Lena’s covered hers in a gentle hold. And that’s when she noticed.

     “You have a bruise on your hand,” Kara whispered. She raised her free hand to let her fingertips brush over the marred skin. _No, not now. This is happening too fast_.

     Her words were enough to distract Lena from staring for a moment. “Yeah… I don’t know what that is.” A shrug as she seemed more interested in Kara’s hand than her own well-being. “I’ve been feeling kind of funny,” Lena admitted. She turned her hand over in Kara’s and brushed her fingertips along her palm.

     The line had already been crossed and Kara was too weak to go back now. Lena’s skin was still soft, though more so than Kara remembered. Even with her focus down on the counter, Kara could see as Lena leaned in closer. “You - you should go… getting late.”

     Those green eyes only came closer as Lena tried to read Kara’s. There was a hesitation, a chance for Kara to pull away.

     Her own eyes closing, Kara turned her head until her nose brushed against Lena’s. There was nothing left in her strong enough to resist as Lena pressed their lips together in a tentative kiss. _Oh gods_.

     Warm breath met Kara’s cheek as Lena exhaled, that heart beating comically faster now. A hand came up to frame Kara’s face with a brush of a thumb to her cheek as Lena kissed her again, deeper. Kara melted into Lena as Kara moved a hand to rest on the other woman’s waist.

     “Lena,” Kara breathed out like a prayer against her lips.

     In a surge of movement, Lena lifted Kara onto the counter as she crashed their lips together. Another woman might’ve been shocked by the show of force. Heat pooled between Kara’s legs as the skirt of her dress lifted and exposed the underside of her thighs to the cold marble countertop. Lena pressed in between Kara's legs, leaving Kara to wrap her legs around her hips.

     As Lena’s hand possessively tightened in her hair, Kara’s mind flickered back into function. Red alarms screeched at her. _Stop._

     “Stop!” Kara grunted, lifting Lena and jumping down from the counter with ease. With a spin and a toss, she threw Lena through the nearest brick wall and out onto her balcony in a pile of glass and metal.

     Breathing heavy from the kiss and Lena’s hands on her, Kara sped across the room to stand in front of the clearly dazed and confused Lena lying on the ground. “Alex cannot know a thing,” she said, pointing a finger at Lena with her eyes manically wide. “Got it?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as always, to @avaswhore for helping me make this chapter that much stronger!!  
> Also if you want to throw questions or reactions my way, I'm @inknosed on tumblr :D


	4. Hands and Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After finding out about Kara's powers, Lena demands answers from the mysterious woman.

    There are times when the earth stands still. And there are times when the world gets so loud, it feels like your very atoms are shaking.

    Lena was stuck in limbo between the two.

    Hands braced on the ground and broken glass beneath her, Lena stared open-mouthed back at Kara. _What the hell just happened?_ If this was a hallucination, it was absolutely fastidious.

    No, the glass under her was real. The giant hole in the side of Kara’s apartment was real. There was still the taste of Kara on Lena’s tongue, a smudge of lipstick at the corner of her mouth, and what felt like a very large bruise across her back sure as hell felt real.

    Both women stood frozen for a long moment, staring each other down: Kara in fear and Lena in accusation.

    The catalyst for Lena standing up was Alex’s loud snore from the bedroom.

    “You just catapulted me through a wall and the first thing you say is, ‘Alex cannot know?’” Stepping over crumbled dry wall and bricks, Lena stayed outside on the balcony. Her hair was out of place and her shirt was half tucked in. She watched Kara scramble for something to say.

    Kara’s mouth opened and closed a few times. “I- you caught me off guard!”

    “Well so did you!” Lena shot back, letting out an incredulous laugh.

    As Lena began to come forward, Kara moved faster and was suddenly pressing a hand on Lena’s chest. “Not here,” she said, blue eyes bouncing between Lena’s, “please.”

    Brow furrowing, Lena pursed her lips as she felt the warmth of Kara’s hand steadying her heartbeat. _Traitorous heart._ “Now wait a moment,” Lena muttered, shaking her head as her wits came back. “You do not get to dictate this. I decide-”

    Before Lena could continue, Kara launched herself into the air with practiced ease and took off into the smoggy night air of National City.

    Gawking up after Kara, Lena called out, “Are you joking?”

    There was no question: she had to follow. So Lena gritted her teeth, curling her fists before taking off after Kara.

 

    The surprise of Kara leading them to Lena’s trailer was insignificant compared to watching Kara land gracefully after flying through the air.

    On the way over, Lena tried to piece together the thousands of possibilities. _Alien? Super soldier? Mutation? Experiment?_ _Goddess?_

    “HEY!” Lena landed right in front of Kara, barring her access to the trailer. Her eyes burned as she stared the other woman down. “What the _hell_ was that? Who are you?”

    Kara fell back a step, one hand flitting up to fix her glasses. “That - is a huge question. Who is anybody really?”

    “You know what I mean.” Turning slightly, Lena began to walk around Kara and truly study her up close for once.

    Kara flinched slightly under the unnerving gaze. “You and I,” she began.

    “You and I what?” Lena cut her off.

    An exasperated sigh left Kara as she gave Lena a look. “You and I are the same.” A small line formed between her brows. “Actually, no. I’m stronger.”

    Lena couldn’t help another incredulous laugh as she stopped in front of Kara again. “Oh really?”

    Tipping up her chin, Kara nodded primly, “Yes, I am. And more controlled.” She brushed past Lena and opened the door to the trailer. Her face almost betrayed nothing, but Lena could sense something underneath like sadness and guilt.

    “Who are you to me?” No, that wasn’t quite right. Lena rephrased, “What are we to each other?” A finger raised to point at Kara. “And don’t try to lie and say sisters. You don’t kiss your sister like _that._ ” The clues were all there, but she needed Kara to say it, to acknowledge it.

    With the expression of someone doing astrophysics equations for the first time, Kara crossed her arms over her stomach. “This is complicated, Lena. You aren’t asking easily answered questions.”

    “And you threw me out onto your balcony. Things aren’t exactly fair at the moment, _Kara_.” Taking a step closer, Lena dipped down her head until she caught Kara’s gaze. “What are we?”

    “Gods, angels… different cultures called us different things,” Kara murmured, taking off her glasses and meeting Lena’s eyes. Whether it was the loss of glasses or the words she spoke, Kara looked older in that moment. “Now, for the last few decades or so, it’s superheroes.”

    “Are there more of us?” Did Lena already know them?

    At this, Kara looked down again. “There were.” Her voice grew quiet, “They all died.” A hand reached out to hold the weak counter of Lena’s tiny kitchen.

    Beside them, the bags of Jiffy Pop on the counter began to crackle and pop as if sitting on a lit stove.

    Kara raised her eyes again, “We’re all that’s left.”

 _Why? Why is it only us? How did we survive?_ And the question ringing louder in Lena’s mind: _where have you been?_

    Rather than ask any of those, Lena reached a hand out to hold Kara’s wrist and lift it as the bags of popcorn continued to grow on the counter. “What is this?” she asked. This feeling she got around Kara had to have an explanation. “Who am I to you?”

    “Lena,” Kara tried, breaking the hold on her wrist easily. She tried to step away.

    This time, Lena was faster in her anger and desperation. She picked Kara up and pinned her against the closest thing by her wrists. It pressed their bodies together, making both of their hearts race faster. The cheap wood of her cabinets broke from the move. “Answer me,” she half-yelled, half-begged.

    Eyes closed, Kara shook her head. “No. You’re not doing this to me again! Not this lifetime, not with the family I’ve built.”

    In the next breath, Kara was tearing through the side wall of the trailer and dragging Lena with her. With a fling, she tossed Lena across the sand so there was some space between them.

    “It always ends the same way,” Kara cried out, flipping her hair back. Her glasses lay amongst the debris now littering the ground. She counted off on her hand, “Persia, Greece, Ireland, Miami-”

    “Miami? I’ve never been to Florida.” With a thud, Lena’s boots hit the sand as she flipped onto her feet. There was the anger back from the first time they met back at Monday Night Spaghetti Extravaganza. There was the fire in Kara’s eyes and voice. “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

    “I am happy, okay?” Hands gesturing around herself and back towards the city, Kara’s voice grew louder. It wasn’t very convincing. “I am _finally_ happy after 80 _years_ of barely surviving-”

    “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Lena repeated over her.

    “We can’t do this again!” With enough speed to make sand rise up around them, Kara put herself in front of Lena and poked a hand into her chest.

    Lena frowned down at the finger poking her and then to Kara. “What do you mean??”

   The next words tore from Kara’s throat as if ripped from her chest, “YOU FORGOT ME!”

    There. That was what broke Kara and wrenched a sob from her throat as tears spilled over, marring her makeup.

   _What? I forgot her?_ Mind running a lightyear a minute, Lena supposed this could make sense of how Kara acted around her. It made sense of the energy between them, the draw in the pit of her chest towards Kara.

    The gold band on her hand grew heavy.

    There was no time to think this through when Kara was crying in front of her. Stunned, Lena reached both hands up to hold Kara’s face, her eyes wide as she stared panicked up at the other woman. “Look at me. _Look at me_. I’m sorry,” she ventured. “I am so sorry.. that I don’t remember you.”

    Here was someone Lena couldn’t remember but desperately wanted to. Kara made it sound as if Lena made a choice, as if this were all her fault. No one would choose a pain like this.

    After a breath, Lena looked over Kara’s face from the scar on her brow to the tremble of her lips. Her eyes drank her in like a glass of water to a woman lost in the desert. She wanted to memorize every inch of Kara’s face, to feel it under her fingertips and against her lips. The draw Lena felt towards Kara anchored itself in her gut.

    Lena spoke softly as she pressed in closer, “But you are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.”

    Like a candle blown out, the fire dissipated in Kara’s eyes. She stopped fighting. Instead, she closed her eyes and relished in Lena’s hold. Trembling hands came to rest on Lena’s waist before curling in to grip her shirt.

    “How could you forget me?”

    The words were so quiet, they would’ve been lost on human ears. Yet the question cut Lena to the core all the same.

     _How could I forget you?_ Lena didn’t know. Nor did she know how to begin to make up for the pain in Kara’s voice.

    “I’m sorry,” Lena promised again. Gentle thumbs brushed against Kara’s cheeks until the tear tracks faded.

    It was the simplest thing in the world to lean forward and press her lips to Kara’s face. When words fail, actions speak.

    The hands at her waist moved up to hold Lena’s arms as Kara turned to catch her lips. That unsteady feeling was back in Lena’s legs as she kissed Kara back with the same desperation she’d felt in the kitchen. Kara kissed as if Lena were about to lose her memory all over again.

    Without opening her eyes, Lena ran them forward until they were inside her trailer again. The missing side wall was proving convenient. A part of her mind pointed out all the questions she still had for Kara. All of that was silenced as she felt the warm invitation of Kara’s tongue against her bottom lip. One of Lena’s hands buried itself in her hair as she melded their tongues together. The bittersweet taste of wine was still on Kara’s tongue.

   They moved with the speed of hungry goddesses to devour each other. As much as Lena liked the dress, she was happier when she ripped it off Kara. The shirt and pants she’d bought for dinner met the same fate as Kara responded in kind. The layers were left behind to worry about in the future.

    Each kiss, each touch was to get the other woman closer. If not for the light breeze coming off the ocean and in through the open half of her trailer, the air would’ve grown heady. Those bags of popcorn exploded open behind them, but nothing mattered compared to the warmth of Kara’s body against her own.

    Kara reached the bed first and pulled Lena down with her, arching up to keep their bodies as close as possible. When Lena pulled back to discard what was left of their clothes, Kara made an impatient noise.

    With her next breath, Lena lifted Kara back on the bed to rest against the pillows. Climbing up after her, Lena let her hands frame Kara’s body as she stared down at her. Another tear dropped from the corner of Kara’s closed eyes.

    Lena left a kiss on her lips before trailing down her body. It was no wonder people considered Kara to be a goddess or an angel. Her body seemed to be carved from marble, yet soft to the touch. The taste of it only had Lena moving lower rather than taking her time. She wanted Kara more than she wanted her next breath.

    Just as her lips met Kara’s navel, Lena reached her hands up to hold Kara’s breasts.

    “Please,” Kara rasped out, opening her eyes to stare down at Lena. They were more black than blue at this point. She reached a hand down to tangle in Lena’s hair. “I need you.”

    With Kara’s legs spread open and her ankles brushing against Lena’s sides, Lena could feel the heat of her core just inches away. Her hands left Kara’s breasts and moved down to brace on the bed. Eyes still holding Kara’s gaze, Lena kissed down past the curly bush. She watched Kara brace herself as Lena moved a hand to hold Kara’s folds open.

    The first swipe of her tongue had a shiver running down Lena’s spine. She breathed out against Kara’s twitching clit before sucking it into her mouth. Those legs tightened around her, holding her in place. Lena lost herself in giving Kara everything she couldn’t put into words.

    When Kara’s arousal began to cover her chin, Lena moved onto her elbows. Her free hand came and two fingers quickly found their way past Kara’s tight walls.

    With a gasp, Kara reached a hand back to grasp the first thing she felt, ripping the pillow in the shape of her hand print. “Lena,” she whimpered.

    As her fingers curled and kept pace with her tongue, Lena watched Kara come undone in what felt like moments. Forceful hips tried to fight Lena’s hold as Kara reached her high, but Lena kept control as she worked Kara to release. With fluttering walls clenching around her fingers, Lena pulled them out to replace with her tongue as she lapped at every drop Kara gave her.

    It was decadent and indulgent, but Lena didn’t stop until Kara was crying out her name again in a way that turned her nerves to live wires.

    Still coming down from her double high, Kara pulled Lena back up her body and kissed her deeply. Their bodies pressed together, Lena dragged her chest against Kara’s in a desperation for some friction. It was all the signal Kara needed to move her hands between them and massage Lena’s heavy breasts.

    Embarrassment was lost on Lena as she found herself straddling Kara’s strong thigh and grinding against her. The slow drag of her clit wracked her sensitive body with another shiver.

    As if Kara knew every inch of Lena’s body, Kara moved a hand down to her core. She nudged Lena’s legs further apart before letting exploring fingers tease along her cunt.

    Their kiss only broke as Kara eased her fingers inside of Lena, leaving the palm of her hand for Lena to grind against. Brow furrowed, Lena hid her face against Kara’s neck as she chased after the heat that tightened below her stomach. She had no fear of breaking Kara as she rode her hand.

    When a third finger was added, Lena muffled a groan by biting on Kara’s shoulder. The mark slowly began to fade as Kara sped her hand, replacing her palm with her thumb to circle Lena’s clit. She pressed a kiss to Lena’s warm skin, whispering reassurances as she guided her over the edge.

    The entire trailer rocked as Lena came undone on top of Kara. She turned to claim Kara’s lips as that coil in her belly snapped and left her bones turning to putty.

    Lena almost felt bad for collapsing on top of Kara, but strong arms just came to wrap around her with one hand wet against her side.

    Still wrapping her head around the past hour, Lena just let herself be held for once as she moved down to rest against Kara’s chest. The heartbeat under her ear was familiar at this point.

    While she still didn’t have a name for it, Lena knew what she felt in her gut. _Kara is mine._ And she was Kara’s.

    Kara wiped her hand clean before returning it to Lena’s skin so she could scratch her nails up and down her back. It was some time before she spoke in a quiet voice, “Absence parts hands not heart.”

    _My ring..._ Tensing at the words, Lena shifted until she was laying on her side next to Kara and at her eye level. “We were married.” It wasn’t a question.

    “In our eyes, yes,” Kara nodded, rolling to face Lena on her side. “Long before the politics of it all.” She lifted her left hand to show her own gold band.

    After a moment, Lena reached a hand out to take Kara’s, brushing her thumb over the ring. “How long have we been like this?” Alive, or something like being alive.

    “The beginning is harder to remember now, but something like six centuries.” Kara looked as if she were commenting on the weather rather than their incredible lifespan. Even after what they’d just done, Kara’s hand was tentative as it left Lena’s hold and reached out to touch the skin over her heart. “Whatever we are, we were built in pairs. We were made for each other. Wherever I go, whatever we do, we’re drawn together again and again.”

    Lowering back down, Lena grabbed one of the ripped pillows to stick under her head as she stared at the chrome ceiling of her trailer. _Six centuries._

    There were still so many unanswered questions, but when she felt the teasing brush of Kara’s lips against her shoulder, Lena turned and quieted everything in her mind by giving her heart what it desired.

 

    Extricating herself from a sleeping Kara was harder in practice than theory. Still, Lena was able to leave the warm bed, or what was left of it. With a kiss to Kara’s shoulder, Lena left her to snore in peace.

    In a minute, she was standing outside the trailer in the first clothes she’d touched: a Joan Jett & the Blackhearts t-shirt over a pair of Adidas joggers and worn Converse high-tops. As Lena walked closer to the edge of the cliff the trailer rested on, she stretched out her body.

    Something wasn’t quite _wrong_ , but it wasn’t normal. She didn’t feel normal, and it wasn’t just the sex.

 _It’s in your head_. It was true she was pushing herself to remember, to even picture the lives she spent with Kara. Nothing came forward.

    The more she sought out the past, the more Lena felt a quiet voice in her heart growing louder. Yes, she forgot Kara, but that wasn’t by choice. _You chose to leave me, to let me think I was here alone_.

    A restlessness began to scratch at her skin as Lena listened to the waves building and crashing down below. While her body tried to pull her back towards the trailer and the woman waiting for her, Lena fought against that impulse. She needed time and space to think.

    Launching into the air, Lena began to sort through the questions left in her head.

_Who was I before? How different am I from the woman Kara knew?_

_What happened in Persia? Ireland?_

_Why did Kara leave me alone?_

_What if I hadn’t found her in National City? Would she have eventually come for me?_

    The green-white-orange-red of a 7-Eleven sign caught Lena’s attention and pulled her down from the clouds until she was walking through the front door.

    Everything was background noise to Lena as she moved through the store, grabbing a soda and a candy bar on her way to the register.

    At first, she didn’t notice the way the attendant stared at her. People always stared at her when the recognized her, which happened a hell of a lot more since Cat Grant.

    “Twenty-one eleven.”

    That got Lena’s attention. Raising her head, she cocked it at the cashier. “Seriously? There’s no way it costs that much.”

    The man’s eyes grew wider as he repeated: “Twenty-one eleven.” His hand came up to cover the last number on the register.

  1. Lena muttered to herself, “...robbery.”



    Meeting the man’s eyes, she watched as he looked down towards his feet without moving his head.

    Of course the night she didn’t want to deal with anybody, there’s someone that needed her.

    With a resigned sigh, Lena forced a hand through the counter and lifted out the robber by the back of their jacket. She tossed him into the slushie machine. “You’ve picked a bad time,” she growled, ready for a fight.

    The robber lifted their gun towards Lena. Rookie mistake.

    “I’ll bet my Snickers against your gun.” She picked up the candy bar from the counter and held it loosely in her left hand. “Who d’you think will be faster?” As she rolled back her shoulder, Lena breathed out through her nose.

    Three heartbeats ticked down: 3.. 2.. _1._

    Both moved at the same time. Just as she heard the bar connect and crack the robber’s nose, two shots echoed in the store.

    Adrenaline still coursing through her, Lena turned to the cashier. “Sorry about the mess. Can I still have the-”

    The attendant moved to lift the counter and get to her. “You’re bleeding.”

    Lena’s brow furrowed as the pain finally registered. Looking down, she raised her hand to the hole in her stomach beginning to soak through one of her favorite shirts.

    “What the,” she began to say as she fell to the side and smacked against the ground with a _thump_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to @avaswhore for being my beta! 
> 
> Only one more chapter to go... 
> 
> Come yell at me for another cliff hanger over on tumblr @inknosed


	5. Death and Transfiguration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After being wounded, Lena is taken to the hospital and surprised to find much of her powers have gone. Kara arrives to explain the rest of their story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings: hospitals, violence, blood, guns, near death experience

     Lena’s world went in and out of focus. Flashing blue and red lights, people talking over her, an indescribable pain in her stomach. 

     The world moving, then stopping, only to jolt her again. 

     White walls replacing the sides of an ambulance. 

     Her shoulders hit the hospital bed as they laid her down and spoke over her protests. Everyone was talking too fast, throwing out words that didn’t connect in Lena’s mind mixed in with numbers. 

     A needle poised over her arm. 

     “That won’t work,” she tried to warn them, only to watch dumbstruck as it pierced her skin. “What the-”

     The nurses and doctors surrounding Lena worked on, following a steady rhythm only known in the chaos of an emergency room. 

 

     It was some time before Lena spotted Kara. The blonde was wearing Lena’s clothes, her hair in a messy ponytail as she bypassed the nurses station and came into Lena’s room. 

     Lena lay in her bra and joggers. The wounds on her stomach were patched up - but they weren’t healing like they were supposed to. It was strange to feel the drugs working on her body, to know she wasn’t healing herself. 

     But all of her focus was on Kara as she came to the side of the bed. In lieu of a greeting, she simply said, “You’re becoming mortal.” Those troubled blue eyes ran along her body to zone in on her stomach. 

     Brows pulling together, Lena’s hand twitched towards Kara, wanting her closer.

     “It’s us,” Kara said, taking the hand Lena offered. A shadow cast over her expression as she looked to their hands. “Being near each other.” She met Lena’s gaze once more. “It’s never happened this fast before.” 

     What could Lena say to that? She was still trying to shake the haze of her medications so she could focus on the warmth of Kara’s hand holding tight. “What do we do?” 

     At this, Kara’s eyelids fluttered as she swallowed thickly. “I have to leave.” Seeing the panic in Lena’s eyes, Kara rushed to explain, “The further away I get from you, the better you’ll feel. You’ll start to get your powers back. Flying, and breaking things, and saving people before you know it.” There was some levity to her last words, but the sentiment didn’t reach. 

     Despite the space Lena had wanted before, there was a difference between taking a walk and the distance Kara was speaking of. She shifted in the bed, wincing against the pain as she squeezed Kara’s hand. “I don’t want you.. any further from me.. than you are right now,” she said between breaths.  

     Kara lifted her free hand up to gently push down on Lena’s shoulder so she would lay back again. A wet laugh broke free from her. “I don’t want to go either.” 

     “Why does this happen?” Lena breathed, using her free hand to wipe away some of the sweat on her forehead. 

     “It’s like I said,” Kara murmured, “we were built in pairs. When we get close to our opposites, we lose our power.” 

     “But why?” 

     There was a wistful spark to Kara’s eye as she answered. “So we can live human lives. Love. Connect,” she said. Her gaze softened. “Grow old. Even die.”

_      Is that what killed the others? Why are we the last ones left? _

     “What happened to us?” Lena asked. 

     The room was quiet for a moment save the beeping machines surrounding them and their mingled breathing. There was such sadness in the way Kara looked at her, bleeding into the way her wife loved her. 

     “This scar?” Kara said, pointing to the mark beside her eyebrow. “It happened sometime around, oh, 250 before common era. We were helping with the Library of Alexandria, becoming mortal again… They came after me with swords.” Her eyes softened as she squeezed Lena’s hand. “You fought them off for as long as you could.”

     Moving to sit down on the side of her bed, Kara pulled up the bottom of her shirt to show a long-ago healed scar on her abdomen. Her voice was quiet, her eyes far away as she spoke. “1742. Ireland,” she remembered. “They said we were witches and came for us with rifles. I told you to run.” 

     As she looked to Lena, she let go of Lena’s hand before reaching out. Soft hands worked to roll up the sleeve of Lena’s sweatshirt. There a patch of skin that was darker than the rest of her skin. Lena blew out a shaky breath.

     Kara’s expression darkened over as she ran her fingertips along the skin. “1850. They set our home on fire,” she murmured. Now there was a deeper pain in her voice, drudged up from their tragic past. The memory burned behind her eyes. But as she looked to Lena, that fire soothed down to a simmer. The corner of her lips pulled up. “You pulled me out of the flames.” 

     Lena reached for Kara’s hand to bring to her cheek. “What about Brooklyn?” Her lips left a kiss on her palm. 

     Kara took a steadying breath. “A new movie was playing in town,” she said, as if it had happened a year before and not 80. 

     It was easy to connect the dots. “Dracula.” 

     The smile on Kara’s lips was just a quirk of her lip as she looked down. “And after, we decided to walk home.” She took back her hand to lift Lena’s from the bed.

     “You took my hand,” she murmured, sheltering Lena’s in both of hers. “And you held it so tight.” Kara closed her eyes and brought the back of Lena’s hand up to her cheek as she breathed in deeply. But that darkness returned as she moved their hands back down again. 

     “They attacked us in an alley. A group of men…” The tears pooled in Kara’s eyes threatened to spill over. 

     “They hit you... so hard,” she rasped, “There was so much blood.” 

     "They wouldn’t let me ride in the ambulance with you,” Kara continued, sniffing away the snot gathering at the end of her nose. “By the time I got to the hospital, borrowed a nurse’s uniform to get through, you were already awake.”

     Lena didn’t notice the tears in her own eyes had spilled over until Kara was reaching a hand up to brush them away. 

     “But you didn’t know me.” 

     “...you were the nurse,” Lena began, “the nurse who gave me my name.” It could’ve been the pain killers in her system or the twist in her gut still throbbing, but Lena didn’t even try to stop herself from saying, “You left me.” 

     The harsh truth of those words had Kara looking down to their hands again. She didn’t wipe away her own tears, just let them trickle down her skin. “You needed to heal… I  _ had _ to go,” she whispered, unable to speak any louder. 

     “And by the time I came back, everything but your memories had healed. You hadn’t even gone home, or to any of our safe houses…” Kara’s eyes were more red than blue as she looked to Lena again. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t think you’d miss what you couldn’t remember.” 

     With as much strength as Lena could muster, she said, “You were wrong.” Green eyes blazed with the years she spent searching for purpose, for anyone who would understand, for the answers to all her unanswered questions. 

     Taking back her hand, Lena quickly wiped at her face to get rid of tear tracks. “So you can’t leave,” she muttered hotly, “Not again.” 

     “Lena,” Kara tried, “you need to heal.” 

     “I can do that with antibiotics and vicodin. But I can’t do it alone.”  _ I refuse to do it alone _ . 

     Beyond Kara’s shoulder, on the other side of the nurses’ station, Lena spotted two rough looking men in black trench coats. Kara noticed a moment after and jumped up to stand between Lena and the open glass door to the room. 

     There was no time.

     “NO!” Lena screamed at the same time the shotgun blast went off. 

     Two shots hit Kara, but it felt like they were shattering Lena as well. Lena gritted her teeth and slid out of the bed to pull up. With a fling of her arm, she threw the heavy hospital bed at both of the attackers with strength she didn’t know she had left inside. 

     Adrenaline pumping through her veins, Lena moved to where Kara lay barely catching her breath on the floor and clutching her bleeding side. “Le-Lena-”

     All she saw was red. “Shh, darling,” Lena quickly hushed, bending down to lift Kara into her arms like Atlas holding up the world. Kara felt just as heavy. Just as precious. “I’ve got you.” 

     Taking a few steps back, Lena broke through the cement and plaster of the wall so she could get Kara to a clean hospital bed that much faster. “I need a doctor!” she shouted over her shoulder as she gently laid Kara down on top of the sheets. Lena’s hands flitted over her wife, spotting the multiple open wounds from the shotgun blast. 

     And then Kara let out a blood curdling yell that shook Lena to her core. It was a sound she never wanted to hear again, though it sprung her into action. 

     As a team of nurses rushed in, Lena tore herself from Kara’s side to walk back out to find the attackers. There was no one to stop her as Lena strode forward, lifted the first man she touched up with a single hand, and tossed him out of the 12th floor window. 

     It wasn’t enough. 

     It didn’t satisfy her need for blood or even block out the sound of Kara’s pain from behind her back. 

     So Lena moved on to the next man still twitching back to consciousness under the bed she’d thrown. With another cry from Kara, Lena threw the man head first into the nearest wall. 

     And then another gunshot echoed in the air, piercing Lena’s shoulder. 

     “Remember me?” 

     Eyes burning bright blue, Lena turned slowly to look at the man standing there. 

     Late 40s white male with graying brown hair and no definition to his body. An unremarkable man, a forgettable one. 

     “You took my hand,” he seethed, shooting off another round that struck the air from Lena’s lungs. 

     It took a moment before she could breathe in enough air to speak. “I don’t even remember your name,” she answered. Despite the anger boiling inside of her, the blue heat of her eyes sputtered out and left her staring down the puny man who hurt her wife. 

     Lena stepped forward slowly, hands shaking at her side. “But you will never forget mine.” 

     With Kara’s too fast heartbeat echoing in her ears, Lena launched forward at the same time the man shot a third round. 

     It didn’t matter. It was too late for him. Lena held onto the front of the man’s shirt as they barreled through the window at the end of the hallway. 

     Wind whipping around them, glass cutting at her skin, Lena screamed as she drove her forehead into the villain’s skull. 

     The crunch they landed with wasn’t only from the glass. 

     Before Lena could even revel in her revenge or gasp from the pain shooting through her body or the open wounds threatening to kill her, the high pitched tone of a heart rate monitor announced the last beat of Kara’s heart. 

     One long monotone sound that set off a handful of other machines.

     There was silence where Kara’s heartbeat should be. Quiet instead of the sound of her breathing in another lungful of air. 

     The world around Lena turned a mighty stranger. 

     She stared up towards the broken window of the twelfth floor, willing Kara to wake up as she listened to their attempts to shock life back into the body. 

     “CLEAR.” 

     But Lena knew the answer wasn’t in their machines. 

     Kara needed her. 

     She needed Lena to go. 

     With the same strength it took Sisphyus to roll his rock up a silent mocking hill, Lena dragged her body to stand. 

     It felt like the first step she took just rolled the rock back down hill. 

     Two hundred muscles needing to work together just to move her inches forward. Muscles that were already screaming in pain. 

     And then started over again with her next. 

     And then the next step. 

     Another, with blood dripping down her body and sweat stinging her eyes, until Lena bent her knees and forced herself to jump. 

 

     Back at the hospital, the heart monitor jumped. 

 

     A choked cough escaped Lena as she blinked away sweat and tears. Another leap had her crashing into the side of a bus and rolling across unforgiving asphalt. 

 

     Another beat of Kara’s heart answered. 

 

     Drawing her body up from the ground, Lena began to shout as she took three more steps forward and catapulted into the atmosphere. 

     The last thing she heard was Kara’s heart before Lena flew on towards the other side of the country. 

     The echo of her scream remained on the streets of National City. 

 

* * *

 

_ Two months later… _

 

     “Alex, can you set the table?” Kara asked from the stove. She sped between washing the lettuce off in the sink and checking on the noodles. 

     Lifting herself up off the couch, Alex left behind her fiancée and her beer reluctantly. “Couldn’t you just super speed everything ready?” 

     With a roll of her eyes, Kara stuck out her tongue at her sister. “I think you can handle this one thing while I take care of the rest.” Speaking of, Kara turned to unwrap the garlic bread as it came out of the broiler.  _ Hm, not enough char on top _ . A quick zap from her eyes finished off the garlic bread. 

     It seemed as soon as the noodles were ready, Kara caught the telltale sound of Lena entering the atmosphere over National City. “Maggie, get the spaghetti!” she called before speeding for the balcony to launch herself up into the air. 

     Was it the smartest move? Maybe not, but Kara couldn’t help herself. Because in seconds, she was colliding into a laughing Lena for a hug that sent them dangerously close to being soaked by a cloud. 

     “I thought we agreed you’d meet me on the roof so those other Superwoman rumors would die down,” Lena said fondly into Kara’s hair. 

     Kara spun them around above the clouds. Rather than answer, she pulled back only to press a deep kiss to her wife’s lips. The past two months had been near torture to get through, even if they both needed the time and space just to heal. 

     FaceTime was a great invention, but it could only do so much. 

     “I’ve missed you,” Kara breathed out against Lena’s lips. 

     Lena smiled to herself and nudged Kara’s nose. “I love you too.” 

     They hovered in the air, only losing altitude when their kissing grew less and less restrained. 

     Somewhere down below, Alex shouted out, “DINNER’S READY!”

     With a laugh, Kara pulled away first, leaving Lena to trail her lips down Kara’s jaw and neck. 

     “We should probably get back down to them for Spaghetti Extravaganza…” Though Kara all too willingly arched her neck as Lena’s hands wandered. 

     “Or maybe,” Lena murmured, pulling back with blown pupils, “we could get into what you were saying on the phone last night.” 

     A quick jump of Kara’s heart gave Lena all the answer she needed. 

  
  
  



End file.
